Miriam-Webster’s full definition of the word rebound is:
a : to spring back on or as if on collision or impact with another body
b : to recover from setback or frustration
I believe there is no skill as important in life, as the ability to rebound, from whatever sets you back. Your ability to bounce back, in a really big way, is what ultimately determines your level of success.
This isn’t an article or blog about how to achieve anything, it’s about how to recover, when you feel as though you’ve lost everything, and not necessarily in relationships. No matter how successful, driven, or ambitious you are, there will come a time in your life, when circumstances beyond your control will knock you onto your ass, and take down everything you’ve built along the way. When a situation has brought you to your knees, and you feel like you have nothing left to live for, how will you get back up? When you have gone from the mountaintop, to the valley, flat on your face, how will you rebound?
Wether it’s an unforeseen illness, an untimely death of a loved one, or a tragic accident, it will feel like you can’t go on. Something, at some time, will make you feel as if you have been stopped in your tracks. You will feel as if you’re going through hell, but what matters is that you are still going, no matter how slowly you go, you are still moving forward. When you’re so far down, you feel like you’ve truly hit bottom, there’s nowhere to go but up.
At my lowest of lows, I never stopped asking “why?” But there aren’t always going to be answers for “why.” There comes a point where you must trust yourself so deeply, and trust that you are loved so very much, that everything you’re going through is making you better, stronger, and wiser. I have gone through enough loss to last a lifetime, but I know that I will always come back because of something greater and stronger than myself, something deep within me that forces me to use a setback as a setup. I also know that just like I prepare for success, I must also be prepped for the times when I will, inevitably, feel like a failure. Daily choices build discipline, or lack thereof, in our lives. Our daily decisions develop our character, and it is character, that will allow you, and I, to rebound. What choices are you making daily, that could help you practice and become a better rebounder?
The best way to make a comeback from a set back, is with gratitude. Being thankful that it’s not a setback for failure, but actually a setup for success. A set up for you to be more than you were, not less. And being more, starts with more gratitude, and a strong mindset. It is nearly impossible to have feelings of fear, doubt, or worry, when you are practicing mindful gratitude, and by that, I mean being aware of all of the blessings you already have. What we focus on expands, so the more you acknowledge your blessings, the more blessed you become. So when the time comes, in which you struggle to know your worth, you are aware of how wealthy you already are. I’m not saying you should walk around with a Polly Anna attitude, seeing the world through rose colored glasses, but see things exactly as they are, and don’t make things out to be worse than they actually are. No matter how far down the hole you seem to have fallen, no matter how deep the shit gets, or how much of it has hit the fan, put on your shit kickers and find something to be grateful for. Once you start, you’ll find it quite easy to make the list longer each time. I even ask my daughter every night to tell me three things she’s grateful for, and about age four, if she couldn’t think of anything else, she would say, “toilet paper.” So if my four year old can be pitching a fit about her bedtime story, crying over not having the right blankie, and fussing for more snacks, and can still find a way to be grateful for toilet paper, surely you, being the over achiever I know you are, can find at least three things to be grateful for everyday.
A rebound doesn’t always just apply to basketball, or a relationship, but it is a skill you need to master in life. Those who have learned to bounce back in really big ways, will find the most joy and satisfaction in life, because nothing will keep them from fulfilling their purpose in their own life, or in the life of those they are here to serve. In the game of life, the best players know how to get the ball back, wether you’re on offense or defense. You can’t score, if you don’t shoot, and you can’t shoot if you don’t have possession, and you really do miss all of the shots you don’t take. Just because you’re down, doesn’t mean you’re defeated, just learn how to rebound better, and play full out every time.
The best players, in any sport, have great coaches. Maybe it’s time to invest in your game, and hire a coach. You’ve worked hard to achieve your goals, and reach the top of your team, but maybe it’s time to play bigger. If you’re feeling a little off your game, or just ready for a bigger playing field, then maybe you need to strategize differently, move in a new direction, or just remove your limiting beliefs with some clarity and engagement. Contact me for a strategy session at firstname.lastname@example.org so you can master the game, and win every time.
For more ways to step up your game and tips to play all out, download my new ebook, “7 Ways to Live More and Weigh Less!” at www.jenniferottsinc.com